🔥 May the Bridges You Burn Light the Way
By Mambo Jae Ashé
Lately, something’s been stirring deep in the hearts of many of my godchildren—and I know it’s not just them. I see it in clients, friends, even strangers who find their way into my inbox, unsure of what exactly is wrong but knowing something just isn’t sitting right anymore.
They’re starting to feel a specific kind of heaviness, a sadness that doesn’t always have words. A dissonance. A pulling away from people and patterns that used to feel like home.
This is the quiet beginning of boundary work.
This is the spiritual cracking open.
And it’s sacred.
We Were Taught to Tolerate
From the moment we enter this world, we’re trained—especially those of us socialized as women, as caretakers, or as “strong ones”—to keep the peace.
Be nice. Don’t cause trouble. Family is everything.
Never burn a bridge.
But I ask you… at what cost?
How many of us have stayed far too long in relationships—romantic, platonic, familial—just to avoid being called “dramatic”?
How many of us learned to abandon our truth in the name of loyalty?
How many of us believed love meant suffering quietly?
That kind of programming runs deep. But it is not divine.
The Difference Between Love and Use
Let’s be clear:
Many people do not love you.
They love what you do for them.
How you make them feel.
What you provide.
The version of you that bends, shrinks, and shape-shifts to fit their needs.
That’s not love. That’s consumption.
True love does not come with self-serving strings attached.
The love of a healthy parent. A grounded godparent. A friend who truly sees you. A partner who honors your growth... that love witnesses you. Supports you. Elevates you.
If love costs you your peace, your health, your sense of self—it’s not love. It’s a lesson.
Blood Is Not the Bond You Think It Is
We’ve all heard it:
“Blood is thicker than water.”
But what they didn’t teach us is the real version:
“The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb.”
The blood of the covenant—that’s Spirit. That’s the soul family you find and build along the way.
The people who are assigned to you by divine design.
The ones who love you as you grow, not just as you were.
The water of the womb is powerful—but not always aligned. Sometimes it carries ancestral pain, karmic ties, and trauma loops we are meant to break.
You are allowed to evolve past the people who raised you.
You are allowed to release the ones who refuse to grow or stifle your journey.
Some People Are Seasonal
Toxic people aren’t always obvious. Sometimes they wear the mask of “support.” Sometimes they say all the right things but move with control, manipulation, and selfish intent.
And sometimes, they’re just stuck in their own pain—doing what they’ve always done.
That doesn’t mean you have to stay.
Some people are part of your story, yes. But not all of them belong in your future chapters.
Some are there to teach, to test, to awaken,
And then? They’re meant to be let go.
There is power in naming that.
There is freedom in choosing peace over proximity.
Burn the Bridge (With Love)
Whoever said, “never burn a bridge” got it wrong.
Some bridges were never safe to cross in the first place or become dangerous with time, holding us back instead of paving the way.Â
I say light the bridge.Â
And here’s the truth—what should be said:
May the bridges you burn light the way as you go.
Let your boundaries blaze.
Let your healing glow.
Let your growth shine so bright it exposes every place you once dimmed your light to stay small and accepted.
You are not here to shrink.
You are not here to be consumed.
You are here to live freely, love deeply, and walk boldly in your truth.
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You are worthy. You are seen. And you don’t owe anyone your suffering.
Love will still find you.
Community will still hold you.
And your ancestors will walk with you every step of the way.
Let the fire lead you home. 🔥
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In service with love and devotion,
Mambo Jae Ashé | www.thehouseofashe.com